Inner turmoil

Posted on 28 Oct 2025 @ 1:46pm by Ensign Ryan Collingway
Edited on on 28 Oct 2025 @ 4:09pm

350 words; about a 2 minute read

Mission: Fractured Accord
Location: Crew Quarters
Timeline: Evening

//Crew Quarters//

Ensign Collingway got through the day, but his thoughts were in turmoil. Mostly due to a certain young woman who offered him tea earlier. Thankfully his quarters were empty for the time being after his shift. He threw his data padd against the small bed and sat down on it with a sigh.

Things weren't going exactly to plan. He had to keep his version of events going. He was a screw-up who got his senior officer killed due to a misfired shot. He had even gone to the Armory and deliberately shot badly at each target in order to maintain that illusion. Not that the security guard...what was his name? Scott? He hadn't noticed a thing, too lost in his own little world of failures. That part at least had been easy. Keep his story consistent, forget the past. Focus on new adventures to make him escape the old. So why was the past biting back at him, harder than ever? He could still remember being thrown against the wall. At Lieutenant Mendon trying to murder him, like it was only yesterday.

“I’d like to hear more about that. About what makes a choice ‘acceptable’ or 'unacceptable' in your eye,” Counselor Halux had said. Ryan closed his eyes. This was the acceptance choice in his mind. Because any other alternative was so much worse.

"You don’t have to tell me what that was,” Alura had said, her eyes searching his face, “but maybe just… don’t walk it off alone."

Angrily Ryan turned on some Vulcan music and listened to it with headphones. Hearing the calming sounds gave him some solace, and he relaxed a little. What he would give to be a Vulcan instead. They at least had mastered the turmoil inside themselves. He really needed to get some books on meditation at some point. Or find someone to teach him.

"Everything's fine," Ryan assured himself. "You're doing okay." Soon they would be out of this star system, and he could focus on new things again.

Ensign Ryan Collingway
Engineering Officer
USS Arawyn

 

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